fantasy

I need a hug right now. I am really a cuddly person but I never show this side of me because I never met anyone who deserved it. Not only that but the one time I showed my emotional side it was like I got left in the desert with an empty water bottle. I never met anyone who was valuable enough to give my heart too.  My uncle once told me never give your attention or look at a man unless they're willing to give you their eye lol. I believe he is so African for that haha. But in a way I agree if someone is not willing to put you first and you settle for them you can't be mad when you're always last. Also, if someone is not willing to sacrifice for you then you shouldn't sacrifice your mind, soul, body and spirit for them as a woman. This is my perception and take on it. You ever wanted to be in love so bad but you're approached by all the wrong people and the right person is not interested in you? Not only that but you're not allowed to date and you're a virgin waiting until marriage. My patience is wearing thin don't judge me though lol. It's crazy how I get attention from everyone I don't want and minimal attention from the one I want. I mean I was never told how much im cared for by the one I care for. However, if I think about it I never told the one I care for that they're cared for. I feel like a sucka for love right now or infatuation because I don't even know what love is. But I know when I get it.... it will be right...... it will be patient, it will be calm, it will be peaceful, it will spiritual, mental and physical. It will be true. huh...if I only I could be in love with you.